Thursday, June 29, 2006 @10:29 PM
here's the real deal
after the hype has settled and the moment's passed. reality comes crashing back to earth as fast as you can say superman returns. yes tht's how it is for me
no more happy happy lala land entry as in the last one
yes they were written on the same day
mere hours apart.
but worlds of difference
one pseudo
one real flesh
that's the difference
yesyes, everyone feels a sense of unspoken surreality whn the covers of the exams have lifted. amidst all the flurry of
'going out-s' &
'let's hit the malls' and
'movie marathons' sometimes weird thoughts jst come flooding back at the weirdest times.
i can never for the death of me imagine why
yeah before the hols i knw thr was this squash novice comp. and we were all t take part.
okay tht's not the bad part
happy excited and evn hyped up in fact. pushing all inadequacy and incompetency to the back of our puny brains.
'when are trainings'
'how many times a week'
'where is the venue?'
'what time is it at?'
'um
ARE YOU SURE?'
thats the whole point.
im not even sure
hello yes im the yr one unofficial.
yes UNOFFICIAL ic
talk to the coach. book courts. coax mrlim. sms people. pay for courts. organise nxt trainings.
uh, tht's my agenda.
basically
and poof suddenly we hv t take part in a squash novice on MONDAY
THIRD JULY
which is also a school holiday
unconincidentally
and mind you today is 29th.
the best thing is i dunno anything
i havent heard anything frm anyone
where. what. when. who. how.
ya tht's about all i DONT KNOW
and im supposed t be the one informed?
hell
i dont knw who t ask
what to do
and its only 3? days away
mrlim? nah i'd jst get a freaking scolding like the last time i did.
i dnt evn know who t get the new court keys frm and whn to do it.
*cue miss tanjf eyerolls.lol
ask wilson? seriously right, i wldnt want some dumb yr1 [me] asking me abt squash stuff whn im neck deep in jcts and the looming a's. wld you. and d'ya think he'd knw?
i doubt it
just great xinen
you're doing just GREAT
and the jcts were a part of the excuse t shuff this matter aside temporarily
concentrating on the books were the one mere excuse i was left with
damn
and nw its over and time to face it
organise this well and off you go
screw it up and you DIE.
yup tht's a dire msg for me.
sometimes i feel like i want someone t teach me the ropes and stuff
not jst leave me t find my footing. slipping inadvertantly [like now]
and telling me what to do.
gosh i miss tht so much
jst someone telling you the nxt training so tht you'd be thr.
oh and one more thing.
i rly DONT appreciate people pulling out of the comp at the last min.
i mean. wht am i supposed t do? im NOT THE COACH
for goodness sake.
and what am i supposed t do? find you a replacement t play for you?
yah tht's right. maybe i'll get the president
how 'bout tht. swt.
oh and did you forget tht i hv t answer t coach for that too. you just say
UH IM NOT FREE. I NEED T STUDY
what???? IP leh pls.
yah and a phonecall settles your bill for monday.
hoho im vry amused.
you think im very damn free all the time huh?
sighs*
i rly dnt knw whr t begin
i've t get this straightened by monday
God whr are you.
go and tell those buggers properly pls. oh and i rly rly need t straighten this out.
hmph. went t oldairport rd t eat dinner jst nw. pretty nice food i guess
let me distract myself a teeny bit before crashing me back dwn t earth. lest the incessant handphone ringings and beeping smses.
i dint bring my phone.sometimes it's rly a hassle.
staying connected all the time. wht's the point?
sometimes i jst wish t hole up in a corner and be
UNCONTACTABLE. shirking responsibilities i knw.
urgh. i hope this'll pass soon enough
had a conv. in the car w daddy abt some economics stuff
then the topics suddenly veered off t LIT
felt that sudden pang of regret and stuff again.
i dunno hw t describe. i knw somehw its part of God's plan for me t tk bio
but heck i detest memorising.
and total disinterest in the difference btwn transcription and replication doesnt help either does it. which let me daydream for a moment imagining myself in a lit classroom agn. and the lit exam. writing my hands t numbness and seeing the many ticks shrouded with masses of blue squiggles of analysis. rurrh
if only i had
but thn i wouldn hv such great people as classmates
whom im gna watch the syf opening w on sat
woah!
very honoured hor!:)
im am too dnt worry
oh and had a wonderful time watching legallyblonde 2 at wee's hse jst nw
but only aft wanting they all left. lol. indecisiveness.
i had fun. but LG1 was definitely much better.
pfft.
maybe absence makes the heart grow fonder. its only half a yr since i last let it go. maybe we'll cross paths agn in a little more thn a year.
my dear literature
i wonder wht the future wld be if i had taken different paths
ah well i'd nv knw
hmph. i feel tons better alr. i shall do wht i have to do
laterr.
oh and im pretty shocked cos daddy jst gave me a CARRIE UNDERWOOD cd
he said the genre of music is 'not for him'
LOL is this wht they call generation gap? you think?:)
he jst heard her sing on the rerun of AI and i commented 'uh hmm, nice voice right'
she was looking pretty swt tht day armed with the guitar and all
he agreed.
and the cd was bought.
two tracks later
'uh i think this type of music is not for me. TOO MUCH NOISE.'
[thinks in my head] i'll gladly hv it
and i did
tht's wht you do whn you buy cds at wimps and fancies
oh and impromptu-ness
off t read my latest novel; finish it rather
honey, baby, sweetheart.
reckless. nice. its frm some straits times bk recommendatn
its shld be gd. so far it hasnt disappointed.
nice layout, yes?
oh and do me a favour. tag okay?
be nice yes.